We know that Borderline Personality Disorder people have extreme reactions to others but does this extend to reactions to your surroundings? My BPD wife (we are separated but still living in the same house. It's complicated...) do not react to my actions as much as before now but one thing I notice now is that she is also very reactive to her surroundings like loud noises, frightening situations or new situations. I remembered more than 10 years ago, we were at a seaside resort and an airforce jet overflew the resort and it was quite loud. My BPD partner had such a fright that she jumped and started crying in fright. Everyone around us was startled by the loud noise including me, but no one had such an extreme reaction as my spouse. I felt compelled to call the resort manager to ask him to stop the jets from over flying the resort.
Recently, there was a lightning strike near my house and this loud event bought me out of my room to check if everything was alright. And then my BPD spouse came out of her room with shock and tears on her face. I can tell you that the reaction on her face was much more shocking to me than the sound of the lightning.
Another thing I have to do around the house is to make myself heard so that I do not "scare" my BPD wife around the house like walking into the kitchen unannounced! The other day she came into the house and was unlocking the front door. I was at home at the time and knew that I had to make some noise so that when she came into the house she wouldn't be startled if she saw me 5 feet from the door when she came in.
These are other "walking on eggshells" events that happen around my wife. Are all BPDs that sensitive to their environment?
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ReplyDeletei have bpd and i scare/startle easily...
ReplyDeleteBeing scared or startled easily is not symptomatic of BPD... BPD's problems are not related to sensitivity to their environment, but sensitivity to the perceptions they sometimes imagine about themselves and others.
ReplyDeleteI've read through your blog and it sounds to me like you're living an unhealthy, unhelpful life - perpetuated by what sounds like an assumption on your part that your wife has BPD.
You are not a trained psychotherapist. You are in no position to make such an assertion, and be so imposing on your wife based on this.
For all you know, you could be the one with BPD, deeply unable to accept it, and driving your wife to insanity through projection and possible shared psychosis (even if it is transient or stress-induced). Think about it.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Folie_%C3%A0_deux